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awesome-daughter:

city | Tumblr on We Heart It.

awesome-daughter:

city | Tumblr on We Heart It.

Realizations turned into dreams

Yesterday, I attended the funeral of my mother’s friend. I thought it’ll be pointless to go at first but then when I got home, I brought back with me deep realizations and feels which suddenly became meaningful in the end.

My mother’s friend was a mom of four kids and she died at the age of 49 due to an illness, leaving her four children and her husband behind plus her parents. Her children are still young. I don’t know them but when I look at their faces, I can tell they are strong, independent and mature. Witnessing todays events just really breaks my heart. The youngest probably age 9-10 cried her heart out yelling “MAMA” “NOO” while her other siblings just cried quietly. Looking at their faces, again I can tell their feelings, the feeling of having no choice but to accept but somehow think positively. I’m not sure what specific feeling that is but that is clearly how I see it. The eldest to me seemed liked he understood the situation well and slowly began to accept the fact while the second eldest is in that process but the third child age 10-13 left me no words, he cried but not as much as his other siblings. I couldn’t tell his feelings but I know deep inside he is suffering.

I realized, if I were either of those children left by my mother or my father. I wonder, how would I handle this situation?

I can’t tell when it’ll be my time or anybody’s time but definitely it is sad. If it was already my time, seeing the people I left behind cry just really saddens me but if it is anyone I know’s time then I’d be the one crying my heart out and being stabbed a million times. Either way it is really sad.

I have never experienced losing anyone I love and I don’t want to experience it, if possible never because it is such a sad thing. All of us is probably scared to die, not prepared or never even thought about it but like the priest said in the homily “Wag natin katakutan ang kamatayan dapat nga ay ikasaya natin itong yugto sa ating buhay dahil biyaya ito ng Diyos, kasama sa plano niya ito sa atin” then I realized, he got some good point. We just have to accept, move on and shouldn’t mourn just be happy about it because it’s one of his million blessings for us.

For what happened yesterday like I said, I realized so much. One of it would be valuing my parents. Seeing the father and the mother of my mom’s friend who passed away do everything for his and her child, I felt that love was too strong. For a parent to be able to bury his own child for me, is more heartbreaking. Seeing them act all strong, I know deep inside it really hurts. And so I wonder, if that was me. I am sure my parents would do anything for my sake and I don’t want it to be to late to be able to express my gratitude and love. I start today, to be able to do anything for them, make the proud and show them how much I love them because it might be too late. Since we really can’t predict what’ll happen to us the next day.

I really love my parents, my siblings, my family,my friends and to everyone I know. I’d surely do everything to make them happy so another thing I realize was not to lose any opportunities given. It’ll surely make my life even more meaningful making them smile and that is one of my biggest dreams in life.

syflove:

cute

syflove:

cute